It is quite difficult to think of a specific
instance but I do believe I have been put in a natural position where there is
almost a responsibility to empower someone. I am an older brother to a brother
two years younger. Yes there has existed
plenty of cutting down that helped him know who the big brother in the
relationship was, but I did have moments where I really did want him to
succeed. As Ziggy said in his post “Show some genuine interest that you really
care about their situation. Make them seem important by being sincere about
their accomplishments”. I try to keep my
brother in line. If he ever is down on himself or has situations, I am there to
help him remember his purpose or to seek it or to simply encourage him as a
person. I am a big believer in people being capable of achieving what they set
their mind to and I hope that has overflowed into my relationship with my
brother. I think sometimes this comes
through in my confidence in him when he screws up. If he screws up and beats
himself up over something, I try to do my best to simply bring the message that
when you fall down the only option is to get back up. I can tell he is genuinely
sorry or upset, life is a learning process and I am there to support him. So let’s say he does something that he
considers embarrassing, most of the time I try to act like that is just what it
is going to take to get to where he wants. That might happen when we drive and
I hand him the keys. He may mess something up but it’s a chance to learn and if
he didn’t learn from the experience I will just tell him what he needs to do
from now on.
An
example of failed empowerment was when I got this kid a job by referring him. I
told him everything he needed to succeed, including describing an attitude that
would lead to success. I told him to call me and that I would help if he needed
any help. He ended up going for a few days and then quit. I was very disappointed
that after trying to help my buddy out in so many ways that the process still
failed. Now he was not fired so I don’t think my advice and support was bad. It
just did not work out. I ended up apologizing to my former boss over this
failed attempt. This example may be a bit of a reach (if not completely off
base).
This
blog is referring to leadership and putting others before you. I have been
through a lot of books on leadership and most of them involve a certain amount
of selflessness. There are many other traits that are covered that empower
people to perform better. The workplace
is a great place to apply these ideas as we get placed in leadership positions
within groups, etc.
I thought your conclusion about leadership as putting others first, quite interesting. It seems as if you are describing chivalry. Do you think it's possible to acknowledge the other person's interests and account for them in a reasonable way without denying your own interests? On a theoretical plane, it isn't possible in a zero-sum game. But maybe some aspect of aspect of leadership is finding a way for both to make out.
ReplyDeleteI think leadership involves selflessness and understanding, but maintain that through this patience and extension of self, the other person becomes better in ways that may help you (ex. As your subordinate in an organization) or in ways that give you joy to see in the sense they are more fully becoming who they are. In this sense, in order to reap benefits, sacrifice may be at times necessary. Still, there wouldn’t be a point to leadership in which one person looks after another if the individual overseeing gives without reaping even if the reaping comes in living through the various successes of the person. It would be too one sided. I think this can be seen in the upset when the process failed. Since you became involved, you wanted to see it succeed. When it didn’t you were disappointed.
ReplyDeleteI actually think the best aspect of leadership is that the leader really shows that what's most important is something other than himself.It is a combination of humility and hardwork. I think the leader has a purpose bigger than himself and then comes others. So the gratification should come from the progress of purpose. I am not saying that leaders are servants but they definitely look to build others up. Sure the leader must have his own character, credibility, work ethic, and experience from the qualifications and labor he has put forth. But I strongly believe a complete leader is of a higher purpose than glorifying himself. Who really wants to follow that. People need to be part of something and then know that they are truly valued. I know the leader I just described is not usually the guy you think of, but that individual gets joy from the purpose and sees the opportunity to help that purpose by empowering other individuals. Maybe my views will change one day but that is how I view leadership. Purpose (could be called vision) and humility.
ReplyDeleteI agree with what Jim said. Leadership is being someone that others can look up to. On a team, there is usually a vocal leader, and then a leader by example. While both roles are very important, I believe that a true leader is someone who can lead by example, and have the courage to lead with their words. I wouldn't say that leaders look to push others before they look to better themselves, but I tend to see leaders as people who stand out in a group setting, or defy odds, or even just being different (and being confident about it). There are many ways to describe leadership, and I think it partially depends on the situation that one is talking about. Any person can empower another though. I don't think it takes leadership to empower another to do something, but I think it takes courage, and care.
ReplyDelete